The beginning of a new year really feels all new to us: David has a birthday, a new year begins, then our anniversary, then Anna's birthday, all in December and January. We feel as if we start afresh each year in every aspect.
This year the new year also marked the end of our first semester living and working in China. On our 4th anniversary, January 7th, we went to Changchun for a day trip to reflect and process on our first 6 months here, and make goals for the second half of our first year. As we sat for a few hours and enjoyed some coffee (good, good American coffee), we realized how much of what we saw Him do in ourselves and through our work was connected to not only what He is doing here, but what He is doing in us and in our marriage.
The biggest lesson we learned (and there are PLENTY to choose from, trust me!) was that we have different work approaches. Let me explain. We have never worked together in this way before. We love it but we also began to get frustrated with each other at times. We would judge each others' actions or lack thereof in accordance to what we thought should be how things are done. This went on for some time until we read an article that a fellow overseas worker shared on social media. It was then that our eyes were opened to what we were experiencing and why we faced these frustrations: we have different work approaches. David thinks and works like Peter, I think and work like Paul.
There are days when David doesn't do what I want him to do or work as fast and widespread as I want him to, and I just wish I could light a fire under him. And then those days are typically when David feels like he has to put out some of my many forest fires. I want to cast nets wide, he wants to cast nets deep. I want to have relationships with as many people as I can, he wants to get as deep as he can, which can only be done well with fewer relationships. I am more prone to urgency, he is more prone to patience. One is not better than the other..can't you see how they are both needed? The two create a balance. And He uses both, that is the beauty of it!
Now, do not hear me saying we are as great as these brothers before us. Oh gosh, no! But their styles and personalities we can so relate to! This was a huge breakthrough to us, realizing that we have different approaches to the work we are trying to do together. Knowing this helps us understand each other more and honestly, it makes us stronger I think. I can cast a wide vision, he can take it deep and hold us steady. I can reach out for the relationships, he can love fully and long term. We have to choose to see this as a strength in our marriage rather than a weakness on days that we do not understand each other and become frustrated.
This has encouraged our hearts so, and I hope it encourages you. Even if you are not married, this can be applied to any relationship in the work. You and your community that you do life with, you and your fellowship, you and your teammates. We are looking forward to seeing how we can maximize effectiveness even more so this next semester working together and playing off of these strengths....and weaknesses! :)
No comments:
Post a Comment